1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,660 Robert Plank: Marketer of the day. Episode 735, the money 2 00:00:03,660 --> 00:00:07,680 nerve, conquer money, shame and make better financial decisions 3 00:00:07,680 --> 00:00:15,900 with Bob Wheeler. Hey everyone, and welcome back to the marketer 4 00:00:15,900 --> 00:00:19,800 of the day podcast. We are here with Bob Wheeler, the financial 5 00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:24,260 expert motivator. And He is the author of and founder of the 6 00:00:24,260 --> 00:00:29,960 moneyner.com which you can find at the money nerve.com and Bob 7 00:00:30,020 --> 00:00:34,460 is here to help us conquer our money shame and get us to avoid 8 00:00:34,460 --> 00:00:38,960 making poor financial decisions by teaching us how our emotions 9 00:00:38,960 --> 00:00:41,980 can dictate our choices, we'll be talking about how you can 10 00:00:41,980 --> 00:00:45,640 have a healthy relationship with money while you might need 11 00:00:45,640 --> 00:00:48,820 financial therapy and so many other things. Bob, glad to be 12 00:00:48,820 --> 00:00:49,660 talking to you. 13 00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:51,280 Bob Wheeler: It's great to be here. Thanks. 14 00:00:51,820 --> 00:00:54,640 Robert Plank: Yeah, glad to have you. And this topic of money, 15 00:00:54,640 --> 00:00:58,720 this seems like a subject that it's easy to get off track, 16 00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:04,320 right? It's easy to just treat life in general too literally, 17 00:01:04,500 --> 00:01:07,560 and then you let all this bad, weird stuff come in, and then 18 00:01:07,560 --> 00:01:10,200 next thing you know, you're making bad money, the sort money 19 00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:14,100 choices. And it's kind of like this weird, spooky ass abstract 20 00:01:14,100 --> 00:01:16,740 concept. I've heard some of these money extra support talk 21 00:01:16,740 --> 00:01:21,680 about things like visualizing money as a person, or how you 22 00:01:21,680 --> 00:01:24,800 need to, like, respect money and all this kind of weird, spooky, 23 00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:28,760 iffy stuff. So having said that, what's, what's your opinion on 24 00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:31,820 this weird relationship we all have with our emotions and with 25 00:01:31,820 --> 00:01:32,300 money? 26 00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:36,200 Bob Wheeler: Well, I mean, I definitely think we all have it, 27 00:01:36,200 --> 00:01:38,960 whether we admit it or not, and a lot of people in business like 28 00:01:38,960 --> 00:01:43,780 to think everything's very black and white. But, you know, I 29 00:01:43,780 --> 00:01:46,000 actually do think having a relationship with the money. I 30 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:49,060 actually go in and talk to my money. Sometimes I'm like, Get 31 00:01:49,060 --> 00:01:51,760 your friends, get them together, let's all get together and have 32 00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:56,680 lots of money. You know? I think what happens is people fear 33 00:01:56,680 --> 00:02:00,540 success, or people fear making the wrong choice, and then they 34 00:02:00,540 --> 00:02:04,080 either hoard their money or they spend it lavishly so they don't 35 00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:07,440 feel guilty that they have it and or a lot of people use 36 00:02:07,440 --> 00:02:12,240 money. I know historically in my family, money buys love, and if 37 00:02:12,240 --> 00:02:16,500 you behave well, you get money, and if you behave poorly, it 38 00:02:16,500 --> 00:02:20,840 gets withheld. So it's like it's out there. People get left out 39 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:24,500 of wills, people, you know, and so people are working to make 40 00:02:24,500 --> 00:02:28,820 sure they get the money, and just being aware of that so that 41 00:02:28,820 --> 00:02:32,840 you don't let that drive you, but that you can actually make 42 00:02:32,840 --> 00:02:33,740 conscious choice. 43 00:02:34,340 --> 00:02:36,440 Robert Plank: And you mentioned some interesting things here 44 00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:40,540 about how sometimes money is used as a weapon, especially in 45 00:02:40,540 --> 00:02:43,720 the family situation, and you also dropped in there that 46 00:02:43,780 --> 00:02:46,840 there's that, that fear of success sometimes right, that we 47 00:02:46,840 --> 00:02:49,900 tell ourselves that we want, we want money, but somewhere deep 48 00:02:49,900 --> 00:02:53,920 down under all the layers, we self sabotage and do maybe the 49 00:02:53,920 --> 00:02:58,120 wrong things, and we kind of like fight ourselves. And so I'm 50 00:02:58,120 --> 00:03:00,720 sure that you've had, in some way or another, some kind of a 51 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:03,900 first hand experience with this. So can you maybe be a little 52 00:03:03,900 --> 00:03:07,620 personal with us and tell us, like, what have you struggled 53 00:03:07,620 --> 00:03:11,520 with and what have you overcome, as far as this weird money fight 54 00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:13,260 that we all have going in our brains? 55 00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:16,320 Bob Wheeler: Yeah, so you know, when I was first, when I first 56 00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:20,180 became a CPA, I was making the money and I had the title, and 57 00:03:20,180 --> 00:03:23,840 life was good, and I couldn't get out of debt to save my life, 58 00:03:24,020 --> 00:03:27,740 and people that were in positions technically lower than 59 00:03:27,740 --> 00:03:31,760 me, making less money than me, were buying houses, handling 60 00:03:31,760 --> 00:03:35,720 their debt. And I'm like, What's going on here? I got the goods. 61 00:03:35,720 --> 00:03:40,100 I got the brains. I got the and and it was sort of insulting 62 00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:43,240 that I had it all together, and I didn't have it all together. 63 00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:48,760 And so I started looking at my own story, and realized that 64 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:54,640 when my parents got divorced, my mom, jokingly or not, said to 65 00:03:54,640 --> 00:03:57,760 me, Hey, look, you better be really successful, so your four 66 00:03:57,760 --> 00:04:01,980 siblings and I can have the life we deserve. And I went, I'm not 67 00:04:01,980 --> 00:04:06,240 giving you a dime. And so I immediately went into I'm not 68 00:04:06,240 --> 00:04:09,300 going to have any money so that when I talk to my mom, I can say 69 00:04:09,360 --> 00:04:13,260 I don't have any money. I can't help you out. I'm not lying. And 70 00:04:13,260 --> 00:04:16,740 so it was this self sabotage that I'm not going to have it 71 00:04:16,740 --> 00:04:20,280 available, so that I don't have to give it to everybody else. 72 00:04:22,620 --> 00:04:25,580 Robert Plank: And I think that in one way or another, we can 73 00:04:25,580 --> 00:04:28,880 relate to some of just that, that weird stuff that on the 74 00:04:28,880 --> 00:04:32,300 outside it seems, it seems ridiculous, right? Like not 75 00:04:32,300 --> 00:04:35,660 having money, so that you will have none to give away. But one 76 00:04:35,660 --> 00:04:38,780 way or another, we all have that, and it seems like there's 77 00:04:38,780 --> 00:04:42,340 that, that it comes from our parents, right? Just like all 78 00:04:42,340 --> 00:04:45,520 the the psychological stigma for any kind of baggage, like our 79 00:04:45,520 --> 00:04:49,120 parents jokingly said this when we were eight years old, or we 80 00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:52,360 saw this with money when we were six years old, and then that 81 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:56,440 just carried us away. So how do we begin to unlearn some of 82 00:04:56,440 --> 00:04:58,780 that? What are the steps, or what's even the starting point 83 00:04:58,780 --> 00:05:00,360 to try to figure all this out? Wow, 84 00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:03,960 Bob Wheeler: yeah. So what I do when I do workshops, when I work 85 00:05:03,960 --> 00:05:07,020 with people, it's to first just start to find out the history. 86 00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:09,600 Did something happen to you when you were six years old, and did 87 00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:12,900 you take that on? A lot of us made vows and decisions at six 88 00:05:12,900 --> 00:05:15,960 and seven and eight, which were probably not the best decisions. 89 00:05:16,140 --> 00:05:19,920 Right now, we're adults. We can go back and say that was sort of 90 00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:23,660 a dumb decision I was I was five, and at least start to 91 00:05:23,660 --> 00:05:26,900 realize, oh, there was, you know, I felt really bad, or they 92 00:05:26,900 --> 00:05:29,840 told me I was terrible with money, or they told me I was 93 00:05:29,840 --> 00:05:33,920 greedy. You know, I was going to be the greedy Michael J Fox kid 94 00:05:33,980 --> 00:05:36,200 that's you always think about money. So I was like, Oh, I'm 95 00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:39,860 bad. And so you look at that stuff and start to say, wait a 96 00:05:39,860 --> 00:05:44,140 minute, that's not true anymore, and then start to be able to set 97 00:05:44,140 --> 00:05:46,960 boundaries with yourself and say, I want to advocate for 98 00:05:46,960 --> 00:05:51,700 myself. I actually do. I enjoy money. I like it, I like what it 99 00:05:51,700 --> 00:05:55,420 does, and I like what I can and I like the influence that I can 100 00:05:55,960 --> 00:06:01,560 use it for. But you have to get your history first, and even 101 00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:04,260 stuff like growing up in school. Were you the poor, you know? 102 00:06:04,260 --> 00:06:07,320 Were you the kid that was on the free lunch program? Were you the 103 00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:12,060 kid that got chauffeured in? Did you have a library at home? Did 104 00:06:12,060 --> 00:06:15,840 you like, did your parents both work? All those things factor in 105 00:06:16,560 --> 00:06:18,720 that we start to go, wow, I don't have any worth, or I'm 106 00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:22,220 better than, or I'm less than and then we carry that on into 107 00:06:22,220 --> 00:06:22,760 adulthood. 108 00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:26,000 Robert Plank: Interesting. What I'm hearing a lot from you, like 109 00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:30,320 you're mentioning boundaries specifically, and also that it's 110 00:06:30,320 --> 00:06:32,960 not, it's not just from being poor, right? You might have 111 00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:35,780 dealt with this because either, like, you had too much money or 112 00:06:35,780 --> 00:06:38,600 not enough, or your parents had this, or there's, there's all 113 00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:41,620 these, no matter what, we probably have the baggage in 114 00:06:41,620 --> 00:06:44,320 some way or another. What I'm hearing from you is maybe 115 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:47,860 breaking the cycle right, breaking the loose that we fell 116 00:06:47,860 --> 00:06:51,340 into these things at earlier ages, and maybe it served us for 117 00:06:51,340 --> 00:06:54,640 a few years back then, but then it's easy enough to just keep on 118 00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:58,480 carrying that same exact behavior so many decades later, 119 00:06:58,480 --> 00:07:02,460 when, wait a second, you grew up, you're not at all that same 120 00:07:02,460 --> 00:07:06,000 person that you were when you had though those, those first 121 00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:09,360 thoughts. But it's easy, just day after day to carry that, and 122 00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:12,840 then you end up in the in the same kind of mental situation as 123 00:07:12,900 --> 00:07:15,840 you might be, physically, right? How there's, oh, there's always 124 00:07:15,840 --> 00:07:18,840 that, that fear of getting into the cycle of debt, where, you 125 00:07:18,840 --> 00:07:21,140 know, you can't get out of debt because you keep having and 126 00:07:21,140 --> 00:07:24,620 paying the debt, and maybe there's the the mental baggage 127 00:07:24,620 --> 00:07:27,920 or mental debt that you've found yourself in, because that's just 128 00:07:27,920 --> 00:07:31,100 how it always has been. And so what I'm getting from from what 129 00:07:31,100 --> 00:07:34,400 you're saying so far, is maybe we need to examine some of that, 130 00:07:34,400 --> 00:07:37,700 even though it might be painful, but that is the first step into 131 00:07:37,760 --> 00:07:39,500 changing some of these actions. 132 00:07:39,740 --> 00:07:42,580 Bob Wheeler: Yeah, absolutely. Like I had a client who, every 133 00:07:42,580 --> 00:07:46,720 four years would, she'd make $1,000,000.02 million dollars, 134 00:07:46,720 --> 00:07:50,200 and then she would completely tank. And it was this cycle. And 135 00:07:50,200 --> 00:07:54,220 after about the fourth time, we started talking about history 136 00:07:54,220 --> 00:07:57,280 and discovered her mom always bailed her out when she went 137 00:07:57,280 --> 00:08:00,720 bankrupt. And whenever she wasn't feeling loved by her mom, 138 00:08:00,720 --> 00:08:04,680 she would destroy her company so her mom could come in and rescue 139 00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:07,860 her. Once we realized that that was sort of going on, she was 140 00:08:07,860 --> 00:08:10,860 able to go, Yeah, I don't really want to do that anymore. Like, I 141 00:08:10,860 --> 00:08:14,160 could just go ask my Mom, do you love me, instead of destroying 142 00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:17,460 my company and like, that was deep seated, 143 00:08:19,020 --> 00:08:21,080 Robert Plank: yeah, yeah. That's, it's like, what one 144 00:08:21,080 --> 00:08:24,500 simple conversation or maybe a phone call every now and then, 145 00:08:24,500 --> 00:08:27,260 would have avoided all these ups and downs and all this this 146 00:08:27,260 --> 00:08:30,560 money wasted. And so since you're speaking about doing new 147 00:08:30,560 --> 00:08:33,380 things and things and like talking about the future, 148 00:08:33,620 --> 00:08:38,060 sometimes you come across these money guys where it just so they 149 00:08:38,060 --> 00:08:40,780 take something boring and they make it so fun, right? They say 150 00:08:40,840 --> 00:08:43,540 we're gonna put money in that, and we're gonna maximize that, 151 00:08:43,540 --> 00:08:45,760 we're gonna save for that, and we're gonna have all these 152 00:08:45,760 --> 00:08:50,920 strategic steps, and somehow they take something that's maybe 153 00:08:50,920 --> 00:08:54,460 people dread, or is boring, or makes it hurt, makes it fun, 154 00:08:54,460 --> 00:08:57,100 because you're talking about all these future possibilities. So 155 00:08:57,220 --> 00:09:01,140 how do, how do, how do some of us pick up on that, or tap into 156 00:09:01,140 --> 00:09:04,320 that, because sometimes, like, I used to have a really bad CPA, 157 00:09:04,320 --> 00:09:07,740 and now I have a cooler one, and I look forward to talking with 158 00:09:07,740 --> 00:09:10,080 him, even though it's kind of about the same stuff, because he 159 00:09:10,080 --> 00:09:12,960 just has all these cool ideas. And, like, he has fun talking 160 00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:16,260 about money, and it rubs off on me. So how the heck do we get 161 00:09:16,260 --> 00:09:18,600 some of your enthusiasm as well? Well, 162 00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:21,620 Bob Wheeler: I think you're you sort of hit the nail on on the 163 00:09:21,620 --> 00:09:27,020 head, it's, I like to be I love what I do. I like to be with 164 00:09:27,020 --> 00:09:30,200 clients. I like to advocate for them. I like to explore things 165 00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:34,640 with them and find people that enjoy what they do. Like, I know 166 00:09:34,640 --> 00:09:37,700 a lot of CPAs and God bless them, but they love to shame 167 00:09:37,700 --> 00:09:40,820 their clients and like, That's so stupid. Or, why would you do 168 00:09:40,820 --> 00:09:44,020 that? And they don't give them a lot of information. When I sit 169 00:09:44,020 --> 00:09:46,720 down with my clients, I give them information. Let's talk 170 00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:50,800 about a plan. I'm on their team and, like, we actually then can 171 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:53,620 strategize, because they know I'm actually not just giving lip 172 00:09:53,620 --> 00:09:57,700 service. I actually with my clients. It's relational. And if 173 00:09:57,700 --> 00:10:00,300 I don't like working with a client, like when I meet. People 174 00:10:00,300 --> 00:10:02,940 up front, I'll say we need to meet, because maybe I don't like 175 00:10:02,940 --> 00:10:04,860 you, maybe you don't like me, and I need to know that up 176 00:10:04,860 --> 00:10:07,140 front, because if I don't like you, I'm not going to work and 177 00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:09,480 advocate for you, and if you don't like me, you're not going 178 00:10:09,480 --> 00:10:12,060 to call me, and we're not going to be in relationships. So let's 179 00:10:12,060 --> 00:10:15,840 figure that out, and then we can move forward. Because I love to 180 00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:19,020 advocate and I love to teach people, but I want people that 181 00:10:19,020 --> 00:10:23,120 want to be with me that enjoy it and want to learn if somebody 182 00:10:23,180 --> 00:10:26,420 just like fix everything for me and just feed me a bottle, I'm 183 00:10:26,420 --> 00:10:26,840 out 184 00:10:28,400 --> 00:10:30,320 Robert Plank: that makes a little sense and and as you're 185 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:32,600 explaining some of the thing, these things again, I'm thinking 186 00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:36,800 back to the CPI I didn't like where she she would always do 187 00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:40,600 this. No, she'd bury your face in her hands, if I Yeah, if I 188 00:10:40,600 --> 00:10:44,260 didn't have some document, or if she said, What did you do this 189 00:10:44,260 --> 00:10:46,660 and this throughout the year? And I said, I have no idea what 190 00:10:46,660 --> 00:10:49,840 you're even talking about. And the new guy, it seems like every 191 00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:54,520 year, he drip feeds me a few things. He says, Well, you know, 192 00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:58,120 have this for your business entity. Or he says, save money 193 00:10:58,120 --> 00:11:01,020 aside for this, or do this with your retirement planning. He 194 00:11:01,020 --> 00:11:04,920 does not overwhelm me, and I feel like every year I get a 195 00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:08,400 little bit better with the checklist and the things I need 196 00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:10,920 to like, the numbers I need to give them, and the documents to 197 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:15,660 give them. I feel like it's slowly more and more gets dialed 198 00:11:15,660 --> 00:11:19,740 in with him. But he's, it's more like he's he's teaching me. And 199 00:11:19,740 --> 00:11:22,760 if he just said, Go and read some some accounting book. I'd 200 00:11:22,760 --> 00:11:25,460 say, Well, why am I learning that you're the accountant? But 201 00:11:25,460 --> 00:11:29,840 he's sneaking in the lessons and and making it fun for me. And it 202 00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:33,500 just Yeah, makes me think of that. It, it could, it could be 203 00:11:33,500 --> 00:11:36,860 your way, right? People don't have to dread their jobs. They 204 00:11:36,860 --> 00:11:39,920 don't. It's because it's numbers and it's money. It could be 205 00:11:39,920 --> 00:11:43,600 boring, but let's try to to make it fun. Is what I'm hearing from 206 00:11:43,600 --> 00:11:44,260 you. Well, 207 00:11:44,260 --> 00:11:46,840 Bob Wheeler: absolutely. And I know a lot of people think Money 208 00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:49,600 and Finance is boring, but when you get to take a vacation to 209 00:11:49,600 --> 00:11:53,920 Europe, or you get to go to Tahiti, or you get to buy that 210 00:11:54,100 --> 00:11:58,180 sailboat that you always wanted, like, that's that's exciting and 211 00:11:58,180 --> 00:12:01,920 fun. So I like look at money as like, Oh, these are 212 00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:04,800 opportunities to give me all the things that I want to do, if I 213 00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:08,520 want to be of service, if I want to travel, if I want nice 214 00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:13,380 things, I can have all of those things if I'm for me having a 215 00:12:13,380 --> 00:12:15,000 joyous relationship with my money, 216 00:12:16,020 --> 00:12:19,620 Robert Plank: right? The dreams, the goal. And it's the same kind 217 00:12:19,620 --> 00:12:23,300 of thinking of who likes, say, going to work, right? Who likes 218 00:12:23,300 --> 00:12:26,420 going to a nine to five job, or who likes spending 18 hours a 219 00:12:26,420 --> 00:12:29,120 day on their business. But if you're doing it in pursuit of a 220 00:12:29,120 --> 00:12:32,240 goal, and you're thinking ahead towards what will that get me? I 221 00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:36,560 can help the lives of my family, or I can pay this off early, 222 00:12:36,620 --> 00:12:40,780 then it gets us through that, that drudgery better. And you 223 00:12:40,780 --> 00:12:44,440 know, I know that you from your bio, I know that you have all 224 00:12:44,440 --> 00:12:48,100 these cool hobbies, right? Like, there's rock climbing, and 225 00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:51,580 there's, like, I think I saw Stand Up Comedy in there, and I 226 00:12:51,580 --> 00:12:54,400 always like digging into that, because it seems like some 227 00:12:54,400 --> 00:12:57,640 there's always overlap, right? There's we learn skills from 228 00:12:57,640 --> 00:13:00,780 this thing we do for fun, and it pays off there. So can you maybe 229 00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:04,740 unpack for us some of these fun and interesting hobbies, and is 230 00:13:04,740 --> 00:13:07,980 there kind of a skill overlap between the work and the fun 231 00:13:07,980 --> 00:13:09,240 anywhere? Yeah, 232 00:13:09,240 --> 00:13:12,600 Bob Wheeler: absolutely. So a lot of stuff that I did 233 00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:15,600 initially, I did because it was, it was scary to me. So like, I 234 00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:18,840 learned to kickbox and spar and all that stuff, because I was a 235 00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:21,560 little guy, and I was sort of afraid if I got in a fight I'd 236 00:13:21,560 --> 00:13:24,020 lose. So I learned how to fight really well. And for a while I 237 00:13:24,020 --> 00:13:28,520 was probably a little too like, you want to fight, and so, like 238 00:13:28,520 --> 00:13:30,980 things like that, I looked at what is, what scares me, and 239 00:13:30,980 --> 00:13:34,700 then I would move towards it so that I could see if it was 240 00:13:34,700 --> 00:13:37,460 really as scary as I thought it was. Stand up comedy that was 241 00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:41,260 sort of a way to do therapy. Climbing mountains as a way to 242 00:13:41,260 --> 00:13:44,560 just get out with nature. But one of the things that I learned 243 00:13:44,560 --> 00:13:48,160 in all of them, you know, climbing mountains, it's baby 244 00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:50,560 steps, doing it one step at a time. You look at the base camp 245 00:13:50,560 --> 00:13:53,260 of Mount Everest and go, Holy crap, I'm going to climb to 246 00:13:53,260 --> 00:13:56,800 that. No, I'm just going to climb 10 feet, and I'm going to 247 00:13:56,800 --> 00:13:59,500 climb 10 more. And then I just learned to negotiate things at 248 00:13:59,500 --> 00:14:03,900 small, digestible bites, stand up comedy, it's about taking 249 00:14:03,900 --> 00:14:07,980 risk. And you know, when you do comedy, some comics will go out 250 00:14:07,980 --> 00:14:10,140 and they don't do well, and the audience is like, Oh my God, 251 00:14:10,140 --> 00:14:13,560 they're terrible. And the comics like, you know, they didn't 252 00:14:13,560 --> 00:14:17,580 laugh at me. Well, it's not my it's not the audience's 253 00:14:17,580 --> 00:14:20,840 responsibility to laugh at me. It's my responsibility go out 254 00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:24,200 and just be, be myself, and be funny, and then, if they enjoy 255 00:14:24,200 --> 00:14:28,280 it, great. But I'm not putting it on everybody else. And so for 256 00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:30,440 me, it's about self responsibility and all those 257 00:14:30,440 --> 00:14:33,860 things, learning to kickbox, learning to getting up and doing 258 00:14:33,860 --> 00:14:36,800 comedy, climbing mountains. It's about self responsibility and 259 00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:38,060 not making everybody else's 260 00:14:39,200 --> 00:14:41,800 Robert Plank: fault. Fantastic. I think that that is a good 261 00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:45,040 philosophy, and I like what you said about, you know, taking the 262 00:14:45,040 --> 00:14:48,640 risks and about baby steps and and so many times like, I'll be 263 00:14:48,640 --> 00:14:53,380 in a situation where I'm trying to figure out a way out of the 264 00:14:53,380 --> 00:14:56,680 the circumstances I'm in, or I'm working on a project, and I 265 00:14:56,680 --> 00:14:59,140 can't really crack it, but I go outside to do something 266 00:14:59,140 --> 00:15:01,980 physical. I do some. Outdoors, and some of the, some of these, 267 00:15:01,980 --> 00:15:04,980 these brain, I don't know, goodies that you're mentioning 268 00:15:04,980 --> 00:15:07,680 here, kind of coming to the surface, right? Like, I'll be on 269 00:15:07,680 --> 00:15:10,020 a walk or on a run, and I'll think, you know, if I push 270 00:15:10,020 --> 00:15:13,560 myself just a little bit, and I get to that bush or that stop 271 00:15:13,560 --> 00:15:16,800 sign, I'll be doing 10% more than I need. And then sometimes 272 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:20,300 it makes it think of like, okay, well, just do 10% more of this 273 00:15:20,300 --> 00:15:23,840 and this work or market more of this, or put aside money or pay 274 00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:27,080 down this a little bit better. It's like the the positivity 275 00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:30,980 that con that you force yourself to find in the physical or non 276 00:15:30,980 --> 00:15:34,100 important tasks, then when you go back to the important task, 277 00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:38,480 your brain's already like in problem solving positive mode. 278 00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:40,240 At least, at least for me, yeah, no, 279 00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:42,760 Bob Wheeler: absolutely, I totally agree. And, you know, 280 00:15:42,760 --> 00:15:45,220 it's funny, as I was, as you were talking, and I was thinking 281 00:15:45,220 --> 00:15:48,940 about what I said, I have to admit, there is a part that also 282 00:15:48,940 --> 00:15:51,700 plays into me doing all these things, all my traveling and 283 00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:56,560 running marathons, I grew up with a belief that I'm based on 284 00:15:56,560 --> 00:16:00,480 my accomplishments, not just like I'm enough. No, I have to 285 00:16:00,480 --> 00:16:03,780 do these things. So part of as much as I love all those things 286 00:16:03,780 --> 00:16:06,720 and I did them, there was a part of me that also did them because 287 00:16:06,720 --> 00:16:08,760 they would look good on the resume. Oh, he ran three 288 00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:11,460 marathons. Oh, he climbed a mountain, right? So there was in 289 00:16:11,460 --> 00:16:14,940 the back of my mind, if I do all these things, it would help make 290 00:16:14,940 --> 00:16:18,240 me more Oh, he's at least interesting enough to come to 291 00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:25,160 the table. So there was a little bit of an emotional push that I 292 00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:28,100 needed to do these things to make because I might not be 293 00:16:28,100 --> 00:16:30,680 enough, and I'm glad that I've done them all, but I just want 294 00:16:30,680 --> 00:16:33,980 to add that as much as I love them, there was a component that 295 00:16:33,980 --> 00:16:35,120 I needed to do them, 296 00:16:36,200 --> 00:16:40,160 Robert Plank: and I get that I relate To, that that sometimes 297 00:16:40,340 --> 00:16:44,440 it's important to maybe, like you use the bad or the, I don't 298 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:47,200 know, use the baggage or use the bad stuff in order to get some 299 00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:50,260 things done, but also everything in moderation, so that we're not 300 00:16:50,260 --> 00:16:53,560 maximizing. We're not You're not running 50 marathons. You're 301 00:16:53,620 --> 00:16:58,060 doing enough where it's a nice conversation starter, a way to 302 00:16:58,060 --> 00:17:02,640 stand out, a way to kind of get, get the result, but not just 303 00:17:02,820 --> 00:17:04,560 overloading for the sake of it, 304 00:17:04,860 --> 00:17:06,840 Bob Wheeler: right? Absolutely, it's a balance, and some of 305 00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:09,900 those negative things can certainly propel us into great 306 00:17:09,900 --> 00:17:15,360 things. Fear is a great motivator, you know? So I I'm 307 00:17:15,360 --> 00:17:18,120 happy with all the choices, and I'm able to look and go, oh 308 00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:19,740 yeah, that's sort of where that came from. 309 00:17:20,580 --> 00:17:23,600 Robert Plank: So you've had all these breakthroughs, ahas, 310 00:17:23,660 --> 00:17:27,380 you've created a website, you've written a book. So can you tell 311 00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:31,100 us about some of these things, about what, what are, maybe a 312 00:17:31,100 --> 00:17:34,220 couple of really amazing things people will get from your book, 313 00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:36,440 and how does it stand out? And where's your website? 314 00:17:37,100 --> 00:17:40,660 Bob Wheeler: Yeah. So you know the thing about the book, and 315 00:17:40,660 --> 00:17:43,120 the whole reason I started writing the book was because I 316 00:17:43,120 --> 00:17:46,540 realized I wanted to get conversations going about money. 317 00:17:46,540 --> 00:17:50,200 A lot of my friends are comics. I'm the CFO at the Comedy Store, 318 00:17:50,260 --> 00:17:54,160 and a lot of comics struggle with money, as do a lot of my 319 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:57,640 clients. And one thing I discovered is everybody seems to 320 00:17:57,640 --> 00:18:00,040 think that they're alone in their money struggles. They're 321 00:18:00,040 --> 00:18:03,060 the only one that didn't figure it out financially. They're the 322 00:18:03,060 --> 00:18:06,000 only one that's trying to present in a way that's not 323 00:18:06,240 --> 00:18:09,180 really true, because they're totally messed up. And so I 324 00:18:09,180 --> 00:18:11,760 really wanted to get this conversation started. So I think 325 00:18:11,760 --> 00:18:14,400 the first thing people get when they start to read the book is, 326 00:18:14,700 --> 00:18:17,940 oh my god, everybody else is pretty screwed up too. Like 327 00:18:18,060 --> 00:18:20,960 we're all just pretending like we've gotten it figured out. I 328 00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:24,080 think we're all pretending to be functioning adults, still 329 00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:28,100 operating from childlike memories. And so that's one 330 00:18:28,100 --> 00:18:32,480 thing. The other thing is creating a space for people to 331 00:18:32,480 --> 00:18:36,020 actually get curious about what their past history has been 332 00:18:36,020 --> 00:18:38,840 about. Why did I make these choices? Instead of saying, Wow, 333 00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:41,980 that's really stupid, it's more about Wow. Why did I do that? 334 00:18:41,980 --> 00:18:46,360 And do I want to keep doing that? So I think over time, I 335 00:18:46,360 --> 00:18:48,580 know people that have read the book. I know people that do the 336 00:18:48,580 --> 00:18:51,220 workshops. By the end of the workshop, people will say, Wow, 337 00:18:51,220 --> 00:18:53,980 I have more money in my bank account, just because they got 338 00:18:53,980 --> 00:18:57,400 conscious about spending money and starting to look at the 339 00:18:57,400 --> 00:19:00,900 choices they're making and actually thinking, do I want to 340 00:19:00,900 --> 00:19:04,500 go out and spend $300 on dinner? Or is that going to go towards 341 00:19:04,500 --> 00:19:07,680 my trip to Tahiti? Oh, I think I want my trip to Tahiti. That's 342 00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:11,100 going to be more fun. And so it really it's about bringing 343 00:19:11,100 --> 00:19:15,540 awareness and and knowing that they're not alone, and there's 344 00:19:15,540 --> 00:19:19,200 no shame in not knowing how to do things, learning how to ask 345 00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:22,340 for help, and finding people that can advocate for you if you 346 00:19:22,340 --> 00:19:25,160 don't know how to do taxes, find a CPA if you want to put money 347 00:19:25,160 --> 00:19:27,260 away for retirement you don't know how to do that, find a 348 00:19:27,260 --> 00:19:30,380 financial advisor, and find people that love what they do 349 00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:33,260 and and get them to advocate for you. 350 00:19:34,520 --> 00:19:37,220 Robert Plank: Fantastic. I think that that as a very powerful 351 00:19:37,220 --> 00:19:39,860 message that we need to have that awareness you're talking 352 00:19:39,860 --> 00:19:43,600 about. We need to be making better decisions, and we need to 353 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:46,960 overcome this money fear, because it seems like in our 354 00:19:46,960 --> 00:19:50,740 conversation, we've touched on maybe eight or 10 different ways 355 00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:54,760 that money has the fear built in and like the obvious one is, you 356 00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:56,920 know, maybe I'll run out of money, or maybe I'll go into 357 00:19:56,920 --> 00:19:59,920 debt, or maybe I'll be homeless, or maybe someone will Reapers. 358 00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:03,480 That's my car. But there's even the the fear of, you know, maybe 359 00:20:03,540 --> 00:20:06,240 looking at some of those scary bills, or thinking about the 360 00:20:06,240 --> 00:20:10,200 scary future, or being afraid to ask those stupid questions to 361 00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:13,560 the the CPA, or making a permanent decision that you 362 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:17,160 can't take back. I mean, our minds can go crazy if, if we let 363 00:20:17,160 --> 00:20:20,960 it, and if we don't unpack and resolve some of these, these 364 00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:25,820 problems that that we're having. And the the book is called the 365 00:20:25,820 --> 00:20:30,440 money nerve. And we all should be going to the moneyner.com and 366 00:20:30,440 --> 00:20:33,200 we go to that website, what will we find? And what should we be 367 00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:33,920 clicking on? 368 00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,920 Bob Wheeler: Well, you should be clicking on the, sorry about 369 00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:41,920 that. You should be clicking on the the the new course to 370 00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:45,280 financial freedom, which is a which is an online course that 371 00:20:45,280 --> 00:20:47,980 we just developed. It's based on the book and based on my 372 00:20:47,980 --> 00:20:51,820 experiences. There's a lot of resources on there how to have 373 00:20:51,820 --> 00:20:55,000 conversations with business partners. We're getting ready to 374 00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:58,780 add a new podcast with just information on what's investing 375 00:20:58,780 --> 00:21:02,100 and what's a stock. Why an S corp over a C Corp? We're trying 376 00:21:02,100 --> 00:21:05,160 to provide a lot of information for those questions. Why should 377 00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:08,700 I have life insurance? Whole Life universal, and trying to 378 00:21:08,700 --> 00:21:11,580 bring in all the resources so that you can ask those 379 00:21:11,580 --> 00:21:14,580 questions. There's no dumb questions. And we're trying to, 380 00:21:14,580 --> 00:21:17,640 like, I asked the dumb questions. I'm willing to go. I 381 00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:20,720 don't know. I'm stupid. I'm a hick. Tell me what's what's the 382 00:21:20,720 --> 00:21:24,320 story, and we try to provide all those resources on the website. 383 00:21:24,380 --> 00:21:27,860 We encourage people to reach out, we answer questions, but 384 00:21:28,340 --> 00:21:32,060 they'll find a lot of resources about practical stuff as well as 385 00:21:32,060 --> 00:21:34,520 emotional stuff. Fantastic. 386 00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:37,700 Robert Plank: And yeah, as we keep saying here, it all seems 387 00:21:37,700 --> 00:21:40,240 to be intertwined, right? If you're if you're emote, if you 388 00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:43,420 have those emotional blockages with money, then your decisions 389 00:21:43,420 --> 00:21:47,500 are going to be hampered, and the emotions can't just go away. 390 00:21:47,500 --> 00:21:50,860 So we need to maybe reframe, repurpose some things that way. 391 00:21:50,860 --> 00:21:53,740 It can help us and not be something that we're always 392 00:21:53,740 --> 00:21:56,560 struggling with, because we could be struggling for a whole 393 00:21:56,560 --> 00:21:59,380 life. So we might pass this stuff down to our kids, and then 394 00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:02,940 future generations will be ruined. Why do that? Why put 395 00:22:02,940 --> 00:22:06,300 yourself through that? When you can find out that you're not 396 00:22:06,300 --> 00:22:09,240 alone, when the information where the information is there, 397 00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:13,200 and we can find that at the money nerve.com where we can 398 00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:16,500 check out that course, we can grab that book, and as we're 399 00:22:16,500 --> 00:22:19,320 wrapping up, winding down, Bob, do you think there's anything we 400 00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:21,440 missed, or do you feel like leaving us with any parting 401 00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:22,100 thoughts here, 402 00:22:22,940 --> 00:22:25,520 Bob Wheeler: I would just say, be willing to be uncomfortable, 403 00:22:26,240 --> 00:22:30,380 be willing not to know and be willing to ask stupid questions, 404 00:22:30,440 --> 00:22:35,900 like, just take the risk like, like, jump into the arena and 405 00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:36,920 and Have fun. 406 00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:43,420 Robert Plank: If you're a future podcaster, new podcaster, 407 00:22:43,480 --> 00:22:46,900 existing podcaster, or you're looking to make more money with 408 00:22:46,900 --> 00:22:50,800 your podcast with less time, you owe it to yourself to check out 409 00:22:50,860 --> 00:22:55,600 done for you. Podcasting.com we handle any or all of your 410 00:22:55,600 --> 00:23:01,060 podcasting needs go to done for you. Podcasting.com right now.