1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:03,720 Barbara McCollough: Hello. Can you see and hear you? How are 2 00:00:03,720 --> 00:00:04,680 you great? 3 00:00:04,920 --> 00:00:08,340 I'm great. I'm great. This has been a wonderful experience. 4 00:00:08,340 --> 00:00:11,640 I've enjoyed the day, and I have a surprise for you that might 5 00:00:11,640 --> 00:00:13,260 help in this. What 6 00:00:13,260 --> 00:00:13,980 Unknown: do you have? 7 00:00:14,340 --> 00:00:18,000 Barbara McCollough: And that is that I'm in the process of 8 00:00:18,300 --> 00:00:22,040 creating a new venture with somebody who's not further on 9 00:00:22,040 --> 00:00:25,880 your list, Lorna Lyons, and so if you care to be to I don't 10 00:00:25,880 --> 00:00:28,460 want to say kill two birds with one stone. If you want to open 11 00:00:28,460 --> 00:00:31,520 up the opportunity in whatever creative way you would like to 12 00:00:31,520 --> 00:00:36,800 include us both. Part of the suggestion would be, I'm happy 13 00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:43,180 to talk about my part, and then we could interview her part and 14 00:00:43,180 --> 00:00:46,540 us together, whatever you think. Yeah, do you want to make a 15 00:00:46,540 --> 00:00:48,940 recommendation about that? Or do you want to know what we're 16 00:00:48,940 --> 00:00:49,720 talking about first? 17 00:00:49,720 --> 00:00:51,160 Lorna Lyons: Or Sure, tell 18 00:00:51,160 --> 00:00:52,000 Robert Plank: me the topic. 19 00:00:52,420 --> 00:00:55,840 Barbara McCollough: Okay, the topic is that we're both in the 20 00:00:56,020 --> 00:01:00,040 human development field, very much like Charles, in a way, my 21 00:01:00,040 --> 00:01:05,100 background has been more of the deep inner work you know about 22 00:01:05,460 --> 00:01:09,900 taking people to the center of who they are. I've been I'm a 23 00:01:09,900 --> 00:01:12,360 former psychotherapist and coach, and I'm currently a 24 00:01:12,360 --> 00:01:16,320 teacher and a memoirist. And Lorna, she can tell you about 25 00:01:16,320 --> 00:01:19,260 herself, but she's also been in this development field. She has 26 00:01:19,260 --> 00:01:23,960 a background in women's studies and in using tools for to help 27 00:01:23,960 --> 00:01:27,740 people identify their strengths, and using those strengths to 28 00:01:27,740 --> 00:01:34,040 take take one deeper into themselves. So what was it gonna 29 00:01:34,040 --> 00:01:37,400 say? Oh, the group that we're the program that we're promoting 30 00:01:37,400 --> 00:01:43,720 now is achieve at any age. And it's, it's, it's focused mostly 31 00:01:43,720 --> 00:01:47,980 for women in the we don't know what Middle Ages, but say 40 to 32 00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:51,760 50, somebody who's been doing something productively for about 33 00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:55,540 20 years and is feeling that restlessness and looking for 34 00:01:55,540 --> 00:01:59,560 something different, and so that's our we have a lot of 35 00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:02,940 experience and background in that topic from different 36 00:02:02,940 --> 00:02:06,060 angles. So that's basically 37 00:02:07,140 --> 00:02:09,720 Robert Plank: what we're getting. Is there a website for 38 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:11,940 achieve at any age? Yeah, there is, I 39 00:02:11,940 --> 00:02:13,740 Barbara McCollough: think it's just recently out, but it's 40 00:02:13,740 --> 00:02:14,700 achieve at any age.com 41 00:02:16,680 --> 00:02:22,580 Robert Plank: It gave me like a weird error when I went there. 42 00:02:22,640 --> 00:02:24,980 Barbara McCollough: Oh, you know, we're working on, but it 43 00:02:24,980 --> 00:02:29,240 will be available. It's actually on my on a part of my website, 44 00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:36,320 Barbara mccalla.com, you know, which is also, you know, part of 45 00:02:36,320 --> 00:02:41,020 what I'm talking about is myself as being a person who you we can 46 00:02:41,020 --> 00:02:46,240 reinvent ourselves at any age, and so that's part of what has 47 00:02:46,240 --> 00:02:49,780 been true for me as well, and why I got interested in in 48 00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:54,280 focusing this in my work. Okay, 49 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:58,840 Robert Plank: well, I think let's just wing it, and Barbara 50 00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:01,620 and Lorna at the same time, but I have a feeling like we might 51 00:03:01,620 --> 00:03:04,980 have to encourage Laura to talk. I feel like she might be shy. 52 00:03:05,279 --> 00:03:06,359 Lorna Lyons: No, she's not shy. 53 00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:10,560 Unknown: All right here, yeah, 54 00:03:10,560 --> 00:03:14,400 Lorna Lyons: I'm good. I'm good, cool. My My program is the power 55 00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:20,060 of purpose program, but we'll, you know, we're doing a 56 00:03:20,060 --> 00:03:24,740 collaboration to sort of fold mine into achieve at any age. 57 00:03:25,340 --> 00:03:27,740 Robert Plank: Okay, exciting, all kinds of connections 58 00:03:27,740 --> 00:03:32,120 happening. All right, ready to jump in, see what happens? All 59 00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:36,560 right, hey, we are talking with Barbara McCullough and Lorna 60 00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:39,440 Lyons. We're going to talk about, no matter what your age 61 00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:43,300 is, how you can still have the best years of yourself ahead of 62 00:03:43,300 --> 00:03:46,660 you. You can reinvent yourself. You can achieve that self 63 00:03:46,660 --> 00:03:49,540 discovery, identify your strengths, get deeper into 64 00:03:49,540 --> 00:03:53,200 yourself and achieve anything at any age. We are here with 65 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:56,380 Barbara mccullo and Laura Lyons, glad to be talking to you both. 66 00:03:56,380 --> 00:03:56,620 Thank 67 00:03:57,340 --> 00:03:58,720 Barbara McCollough: you. Thanks for having us. 68 00:03:58,780 --> 00:04:00,780 Lorna Lyons: Yeah, it's great to be here. Glad, 69 00:04:00,780 --> 00:04:03,300 Robert Plank: glad to have you. And so with all the you know, 70 00:04:03,300 --> 00:04:05,640 the things happening in the world and how, there's always 71 00:04:05,640 --> 00:04:08,760 that discussion of, like, the who knows what, what Middle Ages 72 00:04:08,760 --> 00:04:12,300 anymore? Who knows what old age is, where you have all the all 73 00:04:12,300 --> 00:04:16,080 these possibilities. Things can be done remotely. Things can be 74 00:04:16,080 --> 00:04:19,680 done as far as, like medicine and people are living longer. It 75 00:04:19,680 --> 00:04:23,180 seems like, when I was a little kid, I felt like, by the time I 76 00:04:23,180 --> 00:04:25,940 was 60, that would be it. But then I know so many people now 77 00:04:25,940 --> 00:04:29,540 who are in their 60s, 70s, older, who are like, just now 78 00:04:29,540 --> 00:04:32,240 starting they're just not having fun about well, they're they're 79 00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:35,600 embarking into some new career or some new hobby. And it's 80 00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:38,720 exciting, right? It's exciting, especially for for people like 81 00:04:38,720 --> 00:04:42,700 me, thinking like, Man in decades to come, the the 82 00:04:42,700 --> 00:04:45,820 wheelchair years, maybe don't have to happen. We can do 83 00:04:45,820 --> 00:04:48,880 anything we want at any, any age. So this is an exciting 84 00:04:48,880 --> 00:04:52,660 topic. And so what has both of you excited these days, these, 85 00:04:52,660 --> 00:04:56,620 like these, last six or 12 months in both of your work, in, 86 00:04:56,980 --> 00:05:00,180 in, you know, achieving the most we can what? What has. You 87 00:05:00,180 --> 00:05:01,320 pumped up, riled up? 88 00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:03,300 Barbara McCollough: Well, if it's okay with you. Adlana, I'll 89 00:05:03,300 --> 00:05:07,500 go first. The thing that's gotten me really pumped up is 90 00:05:07,500 --> 00:05:10,080 understanding some of what you were saying. And this is a 91 00:05:10,080 --> 00:05:14,400 combination of our deep psychological state, you know, 92 00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:17,940 our unconscious minds, and the way in which we're programmed. 93 00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:24,620 And there's been this enormous change in the fact that we say 94 00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:28,640 we live longer and we are healthier longer, and so that 95 00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:32,900 gives us what is estimated to be like a 30 year bonus on life, 96 00:05:32,900 --> 00:05:36,200 which is amazing, beyond what your parents your grandparents 97 00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:40,160 had, but what we haven't fully caught up with yet, even though 98 00:05:40,160 --> 00:05:44,200 the conscious mind knows that everybody knows that, and it's 99 00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:49,120 pretty exciting, isn't it, and yet, when you are in the midst 100 00:05:49,120 --> 00:05:54,100 of it, you're also faced with having to undo programming, 101 00:05:54,340 --> 00:05:58,780 deep, unconscious programming about what's expected. So what 102 00:05:58,780 --> 00:06:02,160 I've found with a lot of women that I've talked to is this 103 00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:06,000 presents itself as a restlessness. You know, women, 104 00:06:06,540 --> 00:06:10,500 we think mostly of women, because they also have a certain 105 00:06:10,500 --> 00:06:15,000 layer of cultural conditioning. But people who've been doing 106 00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:18,480 something, say, as for as an adult for, say, 20 years, 107 00:06:18,480 --> 00:06:22,940 they've had a profession, a job, they've raised a family, 108 00:06:23,180 --> 00:06:27,920 whatever, and they start to get a little restless, like 109 00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:31,940 basically, even tired of what they're doing. But we have a 110 00:06:31,940 --> 00:06:35,000 tendency to try to talk ourselves out of it, or we look 111 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:42,580 for external explanations. You know, we might think, and I've 112 00:06:42,580 --> 00:06:45,940 had this happen several times, someone who was saying, you 113 00:06:45,940 --> 00:06:48,160 know, I'm sort of thinking, maybe my marriage isn't right. 114 00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:52,300 There's just something not right, or maybe I should lose 50 115 00:06:52,300 --> 00:06:59,860 pounds. Or maybe, you know, always looking for explanations 116 00:06:59,860 --> 00:07:03,060 for their state when what's really trying to happen is 117 00:07:03,060 --> 00:07:06,780 something much bigger on the inside to be able to really 118 00:07:07,440 --> 00:07:10,500 recreate yourself. So in order to do that, you need to have 119 00:07:10,500 --> 00:07:15,540 tools to go deeper inside and to be able to remove some of that 120 00:07:15,540 --> 00:07:18,300 subconscious programming. I don't know if you've ever done 121 00:07:18,300 --> 00:07:21,260 anything like, say, writing. I'm a writer as well, and I know 122 00:07:21,260 --> 00:07:25,220 this dream pretty well, is that it will always come up as you 123 00:07:25,220 --> 00:07:28,160 face the blank page, it's going to say, well, you know, you're 124 00:07:28,160 --> 00:07:33,020 really not good enough or and at this age, it's sort of like, Oh, 125 00:07:33,020 --> 00:07:37,760 you're too old. It's too late. And so that kind of programming 126 00:07:37,760 --> 00:07:41,980 really stops people from pushing through. So that's part of what 127 00:07:41,980 --> 00:07:46,780 our program is talking about, is that there are ways to be able 128 00:07:46,780 --> 00:07:51,220 to remove actually, again, it's about removing blocks. But it's 129 00:07:51,280 --> 00:07:56,740 from my perspective, it's going deep inside the unconscious. The 130 00:07:56,740 --> 00:08:03,300 other the models of the mind that I look at is that we use 131 00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:08,280 about 5% of our total consciousness. Estimates are 132 00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:12,780 five to 10% and the rest is like a huge iceberg, if you will, 133 00:08:12,780 --> 00:08:16,560 that we don't really have direct access to. And yet it's it's the 134 00:08:16,560 --> 00:08:21,860 place of the most incredible creativity, the wisdom 135 00:08:21,860 --> 00:08:25,640 intelligence and there is, there's more and more with the 136 00:08:26,360 --> 00:08:29,480 modern advances in brain development that we really 137 00:08:29,480 --> 00:08:35,480 understand more about how to go within, to that place, to to 138 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:38,900 harvest, really a native intelligence that's inside of 139 00:08:38,900 --> 00:08:44,320 us. So that's part of the technology that I've accrued, of 140 00:08:44,620 --> 00:08:47,020 you know, more than 30 years of working with people in 141 00:08:47,020 --> 00:08:50,980 psychotherapy and through coaching, and now there are much 142 00:08:50,980 --> 00:08:54,580 more direct routes to be able to get there and to bring something 143 00:08:54,580 --> 00:08:56,020 forward in a productive way. 144 00:08:57,340 --> 00:09:00,100 Robert Plank: Right? So much to think about, about the things 145 00:09:00,100 --> 00:09:05,220 that are expected of us, the decades of bad thinking that we 146 00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:09,240 need to unlearn. And then, like you said, that we only know, we 147 00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:12,120 only have the tip of the iceberg as far as our consciousness, and 148 00:09:12,120 --> 00:09:15,540 there's all this the subconscious, some some baggage 149 00:09:15,540 --> 00:09:18,900 and some potential we can tap into. So, so much to think 150 00:09:18,900 --> 00:09:22,280 about. And so like, what does that mean in practical terms, 151 00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:26,360 like, what's kind of the jumping off point? Is it time to, like, 152 00:09:26,420 --> 00:09:29,480 take inventory, or, like, take some action, or figure out a 153 00:09:29,480 --> 00:09:32,960 support system? Like, if we say we're getting maybe up in the 154 00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:36,320 years, what should we all be doing that the average person's 155 00:09:36,320 --> 00:09:36,800 missing? 156 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:39,980 Barbara McCollough: Well, I have a particular take on that. And 157 00:09:39,980 --> 00:09:43,120 Lorna, this is where we come together in an exciting way. I 158 00:09:43,120 --> 00:09:47,380 believe my take on that, and because of my background, is, is 159 00:09:47,380 --> 00:09:49,720 that you can't, you know, there's a phrase, if you've ever 160 00:09:49,720 --> 00:09:52,900 heard this, it says even that the sharpest knife can't carve 161 00:09:52,900 --> 00:09:57,580 its own handle. And so this is the kind of thing that, from my 162 00:09:57,580 --> 00:10:00,660 end of it, is having the technology to go deep. Are into. 163 00:10:00,660 --> 00:10:03,660 You know, it's not a conscious thought. I can't plan. I can't 164 00:10:03,840 --> 00:10:07,620 come out and say, oh, I want to become this. Because we have 165 00:10:07,620 --> 00:10:11,160 this vast iceberg that I just described. It's sort of Jungian 166 00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:15,600 in a way as well. That may when you think of the five to 95 167 00:10:15,960 --> 00:10:21,140 ratio, 95 wins way more often than the 5% the 5% is our 168 00:10:21,140 --> 00:10:23,780 conscious mind that thinks we know ourselves. Oh, I'm the kind 169 00:10:23,780 --> 00:10:27,260 of person that does X, Y or Z, but that doesn't account for 170 00:10:27,260 --> 00:10:30,740 what's beneath. So it's really a matter of having the tools and 171 00:10:30,740 --> 00:10:33,800 technology, through meditation, and through a certain kind of 172 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:39,020 meditation that allows you to have access to that 95% and from 173 00:10:39,020 --> 00:10:42,760 that you can remove the blocks. I want to I just want to say one 174 00:10:42,760 --> 00:10:46,660 thing about one of my favorite stories about the vastness of 175 00:10:46,660 --> 00:10:51,460 our unconscious mind is if you probably had a pebble in your 176 00:10:51,460 --> 00:10:54,400 shoe when you were a child, right? You may not remember it, 177 00:10:54,700 --> 00:10:59,740 but chances are you had a pebble in your shoe, right? And so your 178 00:10:59,740 --> 00:11:05,400 unconscious mind knows where that Pebble is now, which is 179 00:11:05,580 --> 00:11:09,540 incredible to think about. I mean, it's that, that's that, 180 00:11:09,540 --> 00:11:13,020 and that's what we house inside ourselves. So imagine, by 181 00:11:13,020 --> 00:11:16,680 definition, we can never know everything that's in our 182 00:11:16,680 --> 00:11:20,120 unconscious mind, you know, nor would we want to, by the way, 183 00:11:20,120 --> 00:11:23,780 because it would be like having your whole computer on the 184 00:11:23,780 --> 00:11:26,840 desktop, that we would be dysfunctional. It would be 185 00:11:26,840 --> 00:11:31,400 crazy, right? So, but like the computer, we have ways of 186 00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:35,840 accessing what's beneath it, the surface, and so that's what a 187 00:11:35,840 --> 00:11:38,960 practice, a regular practice of meditation and going within, can 188 00:11:38,960 --> 00:11:43,000 do. Now I would like to just switch here, because I could, I 189 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:47,620 could talk a lot about that what's available in that inner 190 00:11:47,620 --> 00:11:51,220 source. But the thing that Lorna and I have come up with is she 191 00:11:51,220 --> 00:11:55,120 and I both go to the same level, and she comes at it from the 192 00:11:55,120 --> 00:12:00,160 opposite direction. So Well, you can just describe what that is. 193 00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:05,580 Lorna Lyons: Thanks, Barbara. So yes, we we both seek the same 194 00:12:05,580 --> 00:12:08,580 goals. I have absolutely the same vision that Barbara 195 00:12:08,580 --> 00:12:13,080 described about this sort of Third Age and this incredible 196 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:17,160 wealth of skill set and opportunity that we have to 197 00:12:17,160 --> 00:12:23,960 still engage with the world and mine, what we really feel drawn 198 00:12:23,960 --> 00:12:29,600 to do and but in my case, what I developed was something called 199 00:12:29,600 --> 00:12:36,260 the power of purpose, which is a program in which I help people 200 00:12:36,740 --> 00:12:42,280 actually come at it from the outside in, by taking some 201 00:12:42,280 --> 00:12:47,380 national tests that address your skill sets and sort of what 202 00:12:47,380 --> 00:12:51,340 you're naturally good at, because often enough, we've 203 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:54,820 developed our lives by just what was thrown in front of us, and 204 00:12:54,820 --> 00:12:59,140 as a result, we aren't actually playing to our strengths. I was 205 00:12:59,140 --> 00:13:02,520 a financial aid director. I had no business being a financial 206 00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:06,960 aid director. That was not in my skill set, but it's what I fell 207 00:13:06,960 --> 00:13:12,240 into. And so I had that same transition at a certain point in 208 00:13:12,240 --> 00:13:18,480 my life. So I began to see that while I incredibly value what 209 00:13:18,480 --> 00:13:23,420 Barbara is talking about, about that ultimately you should be 210 00:13:23,420 --> 00:13:27,920 having this kind of internal conversation. I like the idea 211 00:13:27,920 --> 00:13:31,640 that I can sort of prime the pump by helping people to 212 00:13:31,640 --> 00:13:35,420 understand what they are inherently good at, so that they 213 00:13:35,420 --> 00:13:40,180 kind of have that, you know, they're playing to their 214 00:13:40,180 --> 00:13:45,340 strengths, and then sort of effortlessly apply those 215 00:13:45,340 --> 00:13:49,720 strengths to what you care about. And so from my point of 216 00:13:49,720 --> 00:13:52,540 view, there are other tests, because otherwise, if you just 217 00:13:52,660 --> 00:13:56,500 know your strengths, it's still hard to transition, which is 218 00:13:56,500 --> 00:14:01,380 where I feel that Barbara's work enters in to help you understand 219 00:14:01,620 --> 00:14:07,980 how to get there, from A to B, in some sense, but also that as 220 00:14:07,980 --> 00:14:13,140 you're unpacking that, in my opinion, if you just stick with 221 00:14:13,140 --> 00:14:17,400 the strengths, then whatever you end up doing is still just kind 222 00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:22,220 of work. And that, from my point of view, if you come at it and 223 00:14:22,220 --> 00:14:26,720 also mine what what you value, what you care about, then you 224 00:14:26,720 --> 00:14:31,700 can effortlessly be in service to what you care about. And from 225 00:14:31,700 --> 00:14:37,640 there, my feeling is that you are absolutely happier, and 226 00:14:37,640 --> 00:14:41,140 those around you are happier. And depending upon the scale of 227 00:14:41,140 --> 00:14:45,400 your vision. It can be very simple and that that will, you 228 00:14:45,400 --> 00:14:48,580 know, change your world, and those that of those around you, 229 00:14:48,820 --> 00:14:52,180 and it can be a much larger vision that can sort of have 230 00:14:52,180 --> 00:14:56,740 these concentric circles of influence going out. And so we 231 00:14:56,740 --> 00:15:00,240 recognized that we are kind of working with the same co. Join 232 00:15:01,080 --> 00:15:06,720 me from the outside in, but her from the inside out, and that 233 00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:09,360 ultimately, they work beautifully together. 234 00:15:10,500 --> 00:15:12,780 Robert Plank: And it's so much to think about that, about like, 235 00:15:12,780 --> 00:15:16,680 you know, finding your strengths, and that sometimes, I 236 00:15:16,680 --> 00:15:19,920 mean, sometimes, we've had to go on this journey of all these 237 00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:23,000 years and decades, just to like, just to pay the bills, or figure 238 00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:26,720 out what we do or don't like, or that thinking and those actions 239 00:15:26,780 --> 00:15:30,380 have led us to this point. But then sometimes, when it comes 240 00:15:30,380 --> 00:15:35,120 time to reinvent yourself or do something new, or your or what, 241 00:15:35,120 --> 00:15:38,720 what excited you then gets you bored now, and maybe it's time 242 00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:42,280 to kind of re position or figure, Figure out where you're 243 00:15:42,280 --> 00:15:45,100 at, but then I like how you said there that there's, there's your 244 00:15:45,100 --> 00:15:47,260 strengths part, but there's also, like, what, what you 245 00:15:47,260 --> 00:15:50,200 value. So that way you kind of get the whole big picture. It's, 246 00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:53,260 it's kind of mind blowing. It's a lot to think about, yeah, 247 00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:56,620 Lorna Lyons: but it's beautiful and and it's to me, and I think 248 00:15:56,620 --> 00:16:00,540 to Barbara as well. It's kind of the only game in town at this 249 00:16:00,540 --> 00:16:03,960 point, like we should all just be playing to our strengths. We 250 00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:07,980 get more done. We are happier. The world can be happier. You 251 00:16:07,980 --> 00:16:11,280 know, it just feels like it's a win win to me. And 252 00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:14,220 Robert Plank: help us understand this in in you know, the 253 00:16:14,340 --> 00:16:17,940 academic understanding is good, but to help us to kind of get a 254 00:16:17,940 --> 00:16:20,600 more concrete feeling about this. Do you have any 255 00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:23,540 interesting stories like this, of someone that that came your 256 00:16:23,540 --> 00:16:27,200 way, that was like stuck in this way, and then you use the the 257 00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:31,160 inside out, puts the outside in to put them on the right path. 258 00:16:31,160 --> 00:16:32,540 Anything like that. Come to mind? 259 00:16:34,460 --> 00:16:36,920 Lorna Lyons: Well, I have one. Barbara, do you want? Do you 260 00:16:36,920 --> 00:16:37,400 have one? 261 00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:39,020 Barbara McCollough: I'm trying to think of one. 262 00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:42,880 Lorna Lyons: One of my first clients, actually, was somebody 263 00:16:42,880 --> 00:16:47,140 who who had a six figure income. She was in her mid 40s in the 264 00:16:47,140 --> 00:16:52,120 health industry, and she was always searching and sort of 265 00:16:52,120 --> 00:16:56,140 internally unclear about what she wanted to do. I met her at a 266 00:16:56,500 --> 00:17:00,240 design your destiny workshop, you know, like we were both sort 267 00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:05,580 of seeking. And I noticed that she was sitting beside me. We 268 00:17:05,580 --> 00:17:10,680 went to lunch, and it turned out that she had been struggling 269 00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:14,580 with this and working with coaches and working with HR 270 00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:19,680 organizations, and over the course of two meals and me kind 271 00:17:19,680 --> 00:17:25,100 of going into my process with her. I, you know, showed her 272 00:17:25,100 --> 00:17:28,340 what, what I thought her strengths were, applied them to 273 00:17:28,340 --> 00:17:32,480 her life. Then kind of did continuous coaching and sort of, 274 00:17:32,600 --> 00:17:37,520 you know, allowed her to sort of meditate into how that might 275 00:17:38,180 --> 00:17:42,280 surface. And within a year, she had completely transformed out 276 00:17:42,280 --> 00:17:47,020 of that work into a passion project that I felt like there 277 00:17:47,020 --> 00:17:51,580 were just, you know, like lightning bolts all around it, 278 00:17:51,580 --> 00:17:54,580 of like, this is what you want to do, and all these previous 279 00:17:54,580 --> 00:17:58,420 coaches hadn't been able to see it. So, yeah, I love the fact 280 00:17:58,420 --> 00:18:03,600 that she really found her work and her niche in a whole new 281 00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:06,600 chapter of her life that was completely different from her 282 00:18:06,600 --> 00:18:07,320 previous work. 283 00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:11,520 Robert Plank: And why do you think that sometimes you and 284 00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:14,340 Barbara succeed when other coaches don't 285 00:18:18,660 --> 00:18:19,620 Lorna Lyons: go for it? Barbara, 286 00:18:20,460 --> 00:18:22,820 Barbara McCollough: I would say, from this perspective, is 287 00:18:22,820 --> 00:18:26,180 because of the area that we both share, is this belief, whether 288 00:18:26,180 --> 00:18:29,600 you want to call it the spirit or the soul, what is being being 289 00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:35,480 beyond the ego or the analytical mind? You know that we all have 290 00:18:35,480 --> 00:18:40,120 such a depth that that people are hungry for. I mean, we 291 00:18:40,120 --> 00:18:43,300 really look I mean, this idea that we came here with a 292 00:18:43,300 --> 00:18:48,640 purpose. I mean, even Rumi, the 12th century poet, said, You 293 00:18:48,640 --> 00:18:51,520 know, we're all created for a specific work, and the desire 294 00:18:51,520 --> 00:18:55,600 for that is planted in our hearts. And so that isn't 295 00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:58,540 something that comes off the top of our analytical mind. I will 296 00:18:58,540 --> 00:19:02,760 tell a brief story about this too, with a woman that recently 297 00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:09,360 started to work with me, who felt that sense of restlessness. 298 00:19:09,360 --> 00:19:14,280 In fact, this restlessness I've used as a term now, because in 299 00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:18,240 the early days of women's liberation, back in the early, 300 00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:22,100 late 60s, early 70s, a woman wrote a book called The problem 301 00:19:22,100 --> 00:19:26,120 that has no name, and in it there, if you It's fascinating 302 00:19:26,120 --> 00:19:30,080 to look at the history. It was sort of this arising of this 303 00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:36,320 restlessness that is also fed by societal forces. And so it took 304 00:19:36,320 --> 00:19:39,320 a long time before it was understood that something new 305 00:19:39,500 --> 00:19:43,360 was trying to happen in the culture really, excuse me, and I 306 00:19:43,360 --> 00:19:47,320 think that we're at that stage again, that it's there's a 307 00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:52,780 restlessness, but because it hasn't fully fomented, that we 308 00:19:52,780 --> 00:19:58,600 look for short term solutions. So I had this woman who was and 309 00:19:58,600 --> 00:20:01,740 it takes a lot of time. So. Right? And when you reach a 310 00:20:01,740 --> 00:20:05,280 certain age, like in your 40s or 50s, you don't want to waste a 311 00:20:05,280 --> 00:20:09,000 number of years trying to figure it out, ruling out like, should 312 00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:12,000 I have gotten divorced? Should I have, you know, you want to 313 00:20:12,060 --> 00:20:15,660 really be able to get to the source of what's going on. And 314 00:20:15,660 --> 00:20:20,060 the the situation that I recently was involved in is a 315 00:20:20,060 --> 00:20:24,680 woman. She's a very much a high achiever, and she's at the top 316 00:20:24,680 --> 00:20:29,000 of her game, and she had been in her profession for about 20 317 00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:32,540 years, and so she knew she needed something more. So she 318 00:20:32,540 --> 00:20:36,620 used the pandemic. I think this is so amazing to to do a whole 319 00:20:36,620 --> 00:20:40,540 PhD program. She that's she was just so drawn. I think she 320 00:20:40,540 --> 00:20:44,860 couldn't be contained through a pandemic. And so she completed 321 00:20:44,860 --> 00:20:49,900 all her work, and then she and I started doing our work, and in 322 00:20:49,900 --> 00:20:55,900 the middle of this, she was offered a very coveted spot to 323 00:20:55,900 --> 00:21:00,600 teach in the program that she got her PhD in. But what, what 324 00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:04,620 we had discovered for her is that she had this deep longing 325 00:21:04,620 --> 00:21:08,400 and a very specific creative project that she had wanted to 326 00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:13,500 do for a long time, and she had that that desire and that 327 00:21:13,500 --> 00:21:18,960 necessity of that had been awakened in our work. And she 328 00:21:19,260 --> 00:21:22,340 was shocked, because right after we started working together, she 329 00:21:22,340 --> 00:21:27,320 got this offer, and her ego, she was just out of the her mind 330 00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:31,520 with how happy she was to get it and but she thought about it, 331 00:21:31,520 --> 00:21:35,240 she said, if I take that, I will never write. I will never do 332 00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:38,660 that project, that very specific project that was so important to 333 00:21:38,660 --> 00:21:45,220 her, and she turned down the the the job offer in favor of taking 334 00:21:45,220 --> 00:21:48,880 on this creative project, and she felt not a qualm about it. 335 00:21:49,300 --> 00:21:52,960 So there's um, those are the kinds of things when we talk 336 00:21:52,960 --> 00:21:56,380 about uncovering some things deep. It also addresses this 337 00:21:56,380 --> 00:22:00,120 question of what's important that you really feel like you 338 00:22:00,120 --> 00:22:05,100 want to do before you die. And one I'll add my own personal 339 00:22:05,100 --> 00:22:11,040 story to this is I had been sorry. I had been a clinician 340 00:22:11,040 --> 00:22:14,940 for many years, and I stopped being a clinician, but my one 341 00:22:14,940 --> 00:22:18,300 goal was I wanted to write a book that had been in me, and 342 00:22:18,300 --> 00:22:21,620 then I kind of write at for a number of years, and so I 343 00:22:21,620 --> 00:22:25,280 completed it and came out about a year and a half ago, and it 344 00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:29,900 was so, so satisfying and so important to me, and opened up 345 00:22:31,220 --> 00:22:36,140 something very important that it's in part what what 346 00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:39,860 encouraged me to go into this work again. I was thinking I was 347 00:22:39,860 --> 00:22:45,820 going to retire, but I felt so moved by my own experience and 348 00:22:45,820 --> 00:22:50,860 but what's available in women of that age, of of this third age, 349 00:22:50,860 --> 00:22:56,080 of the of all the possibilities? So, yeah, I don't know I got. 350 00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:58,480 You could say I get, I get carried away thinking about it, 351 00:22:58,480 --> 00:23:01,680 but it's, it's a beautiful soul work. It's, to me, it's sort of 352 00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:05,760 people uncovering something that they have a sense of, that they 353 00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:08,940 know that is within them, and this conscious mind can talk 354 00:23:08,940 --> 00:23:12,780 them out of and it is really not too late. I mean, the way I 355 00:23:12,780 --> 00:23:16,320 think of this too, is that people get triggered with the 356 00:23:16,320 --> 00:23:19,920 word achieve, because they think, Oh, it sounds like work 357 00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:23,600 or whatever. But from my definition, it's being able to 358 00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:28,220 move from point A to point B at your pace towards a goal of your 359 00:23:28,220 --> 00:23:32,660 choosing. And it does take effort, and that's why it's an 360 00:23:32,660 --> 00:23:35,660 achievement, is there's it's work to do that, to build 361 00:23:35,660 --> 00:23:39,200 beneath So, yeah, and you 362 00:23:39,200 --> 00:23:42,100 Robert Plank: mentioned that a few times here, that there, it's 363 00:23:42,100 --> 00:23:45,460 not an instant process. And that there, there may be some work 364 00:23:45,460 --> 00:23:47,920 and effort involved, but, but that's okay, because look at 365 00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:51,400 what the results are. You're not sugar coating it. You're not 366 00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:56,320 promising crazy, huge spark, instant results. You're saying 367 00:23:56,500 --> 00:24:00,360 these are things that have been covered up in you that need to 368 00:24:00,360 --> 00:24:04,800 be uncovered. And all these, all these last few years you you've 369 00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:09,000 been hesitating, afraid to take risk, regretting, second 370 00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:12,180 guessing, it's time to do the the hard, real work in a good 371 00:24:12,180 --> 00:24:16,860 way, to get to some, some new destination that without this, 372 00:24:16,920 --> 00:24:18,840 you would have had no idea, 373 00:24:19,380 --> 00:24:21,500 Barbara McCollough: right? Absolutely. And I wanted to say, 374 00:24:21,500 --> 00:24:24,140 you know, it's kind of funny, because my the book that I 375 00:24:24,140 --> 00:24:27,980 wrote, it's called digger, a memoir, and it's really about, 376 00:24:27,980 --> 00:24:31,040 it's this process that I'm talking about is about digging. 377 00:24:31,040 --> 00:24:34,160 It's like digging into the depths of yourself and knowing 378 00:24:34,160 --> 00:24:37,400 that there is something that guides you from there. It's not, 379 00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:43,420 it's not an idle exercise. It's it's for real, right? 380 00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:46,180 Robert Plank: So in these last few minutes of us, of us 381 00:24:46,180 --> 00:24:50,200 speaking together, is there anything that you, that you wish 382 00:24:50,200 --> 00:24:53,320 that people, after listening here today, would like start 383 00:24:53,320 --> 00:24:56,380 taking action on something like even just something just like 384 00:24:56,380 --> 00:24:59,920 small and quick to get them on the right path? Should they be. 385 00:25:00,300 --> 00:25:03,480 Be like thinking about something specifically, or are doing a 386 00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:05,820 quick and easy activity? Are we keeping something in mind? 387 00:25:05,820 --> 00:25:09,060 Anything come to mind? As far as, okay, they've heard a lot of 388 00:25:09,060 --> 00:25:12,660 heavy ideas from from both of you. What's something that can 389 00:25:12,660 --> 00:25:14,100 be done today right now? 390 00:25:15,180 --> 00:25:17,160 Barbara McCollough: Well, maybe we both would actually get to be 391 00:25:17,160 --> 00:25:20,960 fun to each of us to weigh in. For me, it's to become more 392 00:25:20,960 --> 00:25:24,440 mindful of what your thoughts are, and your capacity to change 393 00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:28,520 your thought in any moment, and also to be aware of feeling, so 394 00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:32,180 that the one thing, the reasons that affirmations and work like 395 00:25:32,180 --> 00:25:35,360 that doesn't often come through, is you have to be able to have 396 00:25:35,360 --> 00:25:37,760 the feeling along with the thought, the positive thought, 397 00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:41,200 so you can start changing your thought at any moment, and 398 00:25:42,700 --> 00:25:44,080 Robert Plank: what do you have for us? Lorna, 399 00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:47,560 Lorna Lyons: I can actually give something more tangible, I 400 00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:53,200 think, which is something I usually give people after all of 401 00:25:53,200 --> 00:25:58,360 my work, but it's a it's a process that Stephen Cotler K O, 402 00:25:58,360 --> 00:26:02,580 T, L, E R put an article in Forbes magazine quite a while 403 00:26:02,580 --> 00:26:07,440 ago called from passion to purpose, where it's an it's a 404 00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:11,280 process that he just runs you through, where you begin to look 405 00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:15,000 at, what am I curious about? What are the things I've always 406 00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:17,940 wondered about that I haven't pursued because I've been in 407 00:26:17,940 --> 00:26:22,460 harness with my family and my work and and so then he has you 408 00:26:22,820 --> 00:26:27,380 write all that out, then kind of cluster the information into 409 00:26:27,740 --> 00:26:32,240 groupings that seem like they're really fertile for you, and then 410 00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:35,900 you do some research. And he has a process, basically, and I 411 00:26:35,900 --> 00:26:41,140 think it's a very useful way to kind of begin to, again, sort of 412 00:26:41,140 --> 00:26:45,400 prime your own pump. But I recognize and appreciate 413 00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:49,480 Barbara's point that that's just half of the picture, because 414 00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:54,700 that's your conscious mind. And as she said, 95% is unavailable 415 00:26:54,700 --> 00:27:01,020 to us and can be mined through supported meditative practices 416 00:27:01,020 --> 00:27:04,920 that have been really influencing our culture, but 417 00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:08,280 most people don't recognize that they're that they're out there. 418 00:27:09,600 --> 00:27:12,840 Robert Plank: And you think that a lot a lot of us out there are 419 00:27:12,840 --> 00:27:15,480 sleepwalking through life, right? That a lot of us need to 420 00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:18,960 be tapping into some of these tools and maybe face some of 421 00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:22,580 these harsh realities that might be, at first be difficult, might 422 00:27:22,580 --> 00:27:25,340 be a little bit of an awakening, and think, you know, I need to 423 00:27:25,340 --> 00:27:27,740 do something differently, and if I keep doing what I'm doing, 424 00:27:27,740 --> 00:27:31,640 I'll be getting the same thing. So, so much for us to kind of 425 00:27:31,640 --> 00:27:35,180 ponder and think about. And I really like what you said. Also 426 00:27:35,180 --> 00:27:38,480 there Barbara about how we can change our thoughts at any time, 427 00:27:38,540 --> 00:27:41,980 and we don't have to be just caught in that same cycle, that 428 00:27:41,980 --> 00:27:45,640 same loop, we can do something different. It might take a 429 00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:49,900 little bit of help from someone else temporarily, but we are 430 00:27:49,900 --> 00:27:53,560 capable of doing it. It is possible, and we need to get on 431 00:27:53,560 --> 00:27:56,200 that now sooner rather than later, because we probably do 432 00:27:56,200 --> 00:27:58,420 have time. We just don't know how much time we have left, 433 00:27:58,420 --> 00:27:58,600 right? 434 00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:01,260 Lorna Lyons: You never know, right? And the rewards are 435 00:28:01,260 --> 00:28:04,560 amazing. That's the that's the thing. I mean, I get your point, 436 00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:07,560 and I you know, you're correct that it takes some time and some 437 00:28:07,560 --> 00:28:11,820 effort, but the rewards are remarkable about being able to 438 00:28:11,820 --> 00:28:16,800 really be aligned and feel like I'm doing something I care about 439 00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:21,080 and and I'm using my skills to do it. You know that just 440 00:28:21,080 --> 00:28:25,580 because so many of us just fell into our work, and that's not 441 00:28:25,580 --> 00:28:28,760 necessarily satisfying for an entire lifetime, you're no 442 00:28:28,760 --> 00:28:30,140 longer committed to that 443 00:28:31,340 --> 00:28:33,980 Robert Plank: right. Who wants to be a banker their whole life, 444 00:28:34,100 --> 00:28:36,680 unless that's their passion, unless that's their choice, 445 00:28:36,860 --> 00:28:42,040 exactly? Well, cool. Well, if people are listening this, 446 00:28:42,040 --> 00:28:45,100 watching this, and they say this, all sounds good. I want to 447 00:28:45,100 --> 00:28:48,280 be aligned. I want my purpose. I want my passion. What's the next 448 00:28:48,280 --> 00:28:52,120 step? How do they reach out to both of you, and how do they 449 00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:55,840 just kind of apply some of the things we've heard about here? 450 00:28:59,020 --> 00:29:01,560 Barbara McCollough: Go ahead. Go ahead. Barbara, okay, well, for 451 00:29:01,560 --> 00:29:06,660 me, you could either go to achieve at any age.com and I 452 00:29:06,660 --> 00:29:09,480 have a mailing list there, and you can sign up, and we can let 453 00:29:09,480 --> 00:29:12,900 you know about the program that we're developing. Or if you're 454 00:29:12,900 --> 00:29:17,520 interested in my memoir digger, you can go to 455 00:29:17,520 --> 00:29:22,160 barbara@barbaramacculla.com and download some free chapters of 456 00:29:22,160 --> 00:29:24,740 the book. I think you really like it, and it gives you a 457 00:29:24,740 --> 00:29:29,720 sense of what can what can arise when you pay attention to to 458 00:29:30,020 --> 00:29:34,100 enter inner, inner, yes, 459 00:29:34,160 --> 00:29:37,220 Lorna Lyons: exactly No. Her book is incredible, and I really 460 00:29:37,220 --> 00:29:42,280 encourage everyone to check it out. It's amazing, and it's our 461 00:29:42,280 --> 00:29:45,580 backstory about why we even got to know each other is sort of 462 00:29:45,580 --> 00:29:49,360 buried within it. And for me, you can reach me at Lorna 463 00:29:49,360 --> 00:29:55,480 lyons.com I do many things, and so you want to go up in the 464 00:29:55,480 --> 00:29:59,380 navigation bar to more, and you'll find the power of 465 00:29:59,380 --> 00:30:03,360 purpose. Is there, but I encourage everyone to just go 466 00:30:03,360 --> 00:30:06,720 through Barbara's portal of achieve at any age, and we will 467 00:30:06,720 --> 00:30:08,640 be working, collaborating together. 468 00:30:09,720 --> 00:30:11,220 Robert Plank: Cool that is achieve@neh.com 469 00:30:12,840 --> 00:30:17,820 barbaramaccula.com and Lorna lyons.com and more is right, 470 00:30:17,820 --> 00:30:21,980 right. We're here because we want more in multiple meanings 471 00:30:21,980 --> 00:30:25,580 of the word. So if we want more, then it's not enough to just 472 00:30:25,580 --> 00:30:28,520 listen to the podcast episode and say, That sounds good. I'll 473 00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:31,760 tuck that away and I'll go about my day. No, do more? Go to 474 00:30:31,760 --> 00:30:35,720 achieve@neh.com go to barbaramacolor.com go to Lorna 475 00:30:35,720 --> 00:30:39,620 lyons.com but most importantly, achieve at NEH is that portal? 476 00:30:39,620 --> 00:30:43,480 Is that very first place that in fact, if you're near a computer 477 00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:47,020 or a phone, dial it up right now while the podcast is still 478 00:30:47,020 --> 00:30:49,840 playing, because you might get distracted by something else in 479 00:30:49,840 --> 00:30:52,600 the same way that you let you let yourself get distracted by 480 00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:55,420 your career or something else at an earlier age. Don't let the 481 00:30:55,420 --> 00:30:58,900 distractions always win. Figure out those strengths. Figure out 482 00:30:58,900 --> 00:31:02,340 that alignment, achieve at any age.com. We'll see you there, 483 00:31:02,340 --> 00:31:04,140 and thanks for you too for stopping by. 484 00:31:04,680 --> 00:31:05,520 Barbara McCollough: Thank you so 485 00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:07,980 Lorna Lyons: much. Robert, that was a perfect wrap. Thank you so 486 00:31:07,980 --> 00:31:09,360 much. Bye.